Buckwhite in Africa

This is an immensely overdue blog! Upon reflection of Brian’s visit to Rwanda I have concluded that the things that have become ‘normal’ to me are not necessarily part of life in American. Sitting on a hot and uncomfortable bus for 45 minutes before it departs, being stared at intensely with gawking uncomfortable eye contact, having random strangers poke and touch you, being in a culture where there are no lines or order and public nose picking is socially acceptable, without warning or an adjustment period these realities can be very overwhelming.

After traveling for nearly 24 hours on numerous flights and adjusting to a different time schedule, most people would want to relax and slow exploration down. However, with Avery that was not an option, I had a great plan, if we did everything I wanted to during the first week and something went wrong then we would still have the second week for more activities. I had logic in my planning but I did not take into account that maybe rest for a while and a sense of bearings and comfort level before diving head first into adventures might have been appreciated. Oops. I was excited and wanted to make the most of the visit.

Brian arrives in Kigali, the capital and only airport in county. I planned to pick him up form the airport and take a private taxi to the center of town, public transport was ruled out. However, to my surprise, my counterpart and her family showed up at the airport. For weeks I politely told people form my village that they did not need to accompany me to the airport for Brian’s arrival. This was a difficult task, part of their culture is sitting and waiting for people, welcoming them when they arrive. I explained that Brian would be very tired from his travels and would want to rest. Also most people that wanted to come do not have disposable income to travel to the capital- all $4 USD- and I did not want to feel guilty that they spent on travel what should be spent on food and their families. The people understood and I explained that it is our culture to visit people once a guest is settled, when I promised we would visit no one took offense. My counterpart’s husband has a car, it was nice that they were there and were able to drive us downtown. Having my counterpart and her family there was not as awkward as I expected. We still had the Hollywood hello where I saw him from a distance and then ran towards him, in slow motion, with tears, and fell into his welcoming arms-something to that effect. If anything my counterpart added to the cinematic quality, she brought flowers.

My standards of hotels have definitely declined. St. Paul’s, where we stayed, is the equivalent of the skeeviest motel 6 in the Midwest of America. I sprung for the upgrade with a private bathroom in our room rather than communal ones. There was a trickle of warm water from a rusty showerhead that you needed to manually hold up. The Rwandafoam bed has probably been there for as long as I have been alive, concave in the center, thankfully bed bug free. Brian was a good sport, after a few quick jokes the lizard on the ceiling was named Lenny and all was well. I'm sure the nap helped things some.

We schlepped up the hills of Kigali the following morning, with the Africa sun beaming, to the bus station with Brian’s luggage, and the 11 dictionaries I requested. I put Brian in the very front of the bus to make sure he had a good view during journey. We headed off to the north where I live, I had a set schedule that I wanted to adhere to! Mulindi tea factory tour a few mountain tops over, ‘ribbon cutting’ conclusion ceremony at a school for a water project, a visit to the tailor for a traditional outfit, lunch with my host family, exploration of the market, craft time with the ladies at the co-op….I had it all planned out, every minute of it.
TIA- This is Africa- you cannot plan every detail, everything can and most likely will go wrong. I got to introduce Brian to the majority of the people I had promised and see most of the sites I wanted to. Brian’s arrival was talked about for months; everyone was anticipating his visit with enthusiasm. A white male coming to visit the female volunteer that they have taken in was a very big deal. Overall I feel everything was successful.

Sir Blian- as he was referred to, was a hit with everyone. At one ceremony he was asked to give a speech in front of 500+ children, the PTA committee, and teachers of a primary school. The students danced for him with traditional headdresses and praised him.

In addition to my site I wanted to show him some of the country. This included an 8-hour trip to Nyunguye rainforest. We stayed with my friends who live a 2-hour walk/hike into the rainforest in a miniature adorable village. The hike was a journey in itself, we walked over the fluffy pine needles that have been collecting and piling up for over 30 years and learned the migrant patters of different animals. We then had to wake well before the sun to meet the chimp tracker and find the chimps. After climbing up an almost vertical hill with our mandatory walking sticks we spotted them- we had 180-degree panoramic views of 30 chimps. Thankfully they didn’t throw poop at us either, they are known to. The adventures continued.

Through the darkness and the hustle and bustle we managed to just barley get the last bus to Byumba, where I live. We squeeze in, crammed on with women that smell like old cheese and crying babies we are ready to take off. That is until the accordion door that has been progressively getting worse over the last few months flies off the hinges. They try to fix the door, rocks and slamming it doesn’t work, another bus is eventually called. Once we board it was smooth sailing back to my concrete dwelling. After a few days and some mild adventures in Byumba we went to the beautiful Lake Kivu and enjoyed a much-deserved cold beer and relaxing evening.

Overall it was a completely successful trip. However, it gave me perspective to see someone thrown into what I had 8 months to adjust to. The ways I have modified my behavior and reactions and changed have been gradual progressions and adaptations over time.

B-Ri-Collins thank you for coming to Africa- I could not be happier that you came here and experienced this with me. I love you.